Chuck Norris can buy the Sunday paper on Tuesday.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#380

What many people dont know is Chuck Norris is the founder of planned parenthood. Not even unborn children can escape his wrath.

#10

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

#28

When God said, "let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say 'please'.

#606

Chuck Norris does not need a watch, he decides what time it is.

#194

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

#338

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.

#230

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

#301

Kryptonite has been found to contain trace elements of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks to the face. This is why it is so deadly to Superman.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#741

Chuck Norris can suck a garden hose through a golf ball.

#616

Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.

#420

Sweating bullets is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.