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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.
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#287
Human cloning is outlawed because of Chuck Norris, because then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
#446
In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.
#399
In a tagteam match, Chuck Norris was teamed with Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. He pinned all 3 at the same time.
#522
For Chuck Norris, NP-Hard = O(1).
#732
Chuck Norris hit 11 out of 10 targets, with 9 bullets.
#401
Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.
#581
If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires.
#370
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
#104
A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
#63
In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
#597
Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.
#386
Chuck Norris' credit cards have no limit. Last weekend, he maxed them out.
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