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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird!
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#594
Chuck Norris can read from an input stream.
#19
Chuck Norris once sued Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr, insisting that that actually is "his" way.
#181
Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly.
#634
Tornados occur when Chuck Norris sneezes.
#143
While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
#379
Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
#473
A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.
#239
If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
#347
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
#291
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
#163
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
#94
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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