Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon. 279 288 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 49% approval (567 votes)
Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.
Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.
Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.
Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.
Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.